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President Ted Cruz (Al Gore wins Colorado in 2000)

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In this timeline, Texas Senator Ted Cruz is elected President of the United States in 2012.

Disclaimer

I, the writer, do not condone any forms of violence, child abuse, or forced religion. This is only a project that I, the writer, came up with in my spare time. NONE of the events shown below should be taken in a serious matter.

2012

November 6: Republican Candidate Ted Cruz defeats Incumbent John Kerry 275-263.

November 6: The Senate and HORs both overwhelmingly go to the Republicans.

2013

January 21: President Ted Cruz and Vice President Jerry Falwell Jr (president of Liberty University) are inaugurated into office.   

Presidential Cabinet

President Ted Cruz
Vice-President Jerry Falwell Jr.
Department of State Pastor Michael Pearl
Department of the Treasury Pastor Micah Armstrong
Department of Defense Pastor Sean Harris
Department of Justice Pastor Jonathan Falwell
Department of the Interior Troy Shoemaker
Department of Agriculture Pastor Steven Anderson
Department of Commerce Kevin J. Worthen
Department of Labor Raylan Alleman
Department of Health/Human Services Bob Jones III
Department of Housing/Urban Development Kevin Schatz (To Train Up a Child)
Department of Transportation Pastor Joel Osteen
Department of Energy Karl Rove
Department of Education Jed Smock
Department of Veteran Affairs Bill Still
Department of Homeland Security Larry Williams (To Train Up a Child)

January 22: A bill is signed by President Ted Cruz that highly loosens the laws regarding corporal punishment on children.  

Corporal Punishment Bill (in Detail):

A parent, legal guardian, educator, or principal is permitted to use any physical discipline necessary on children of any age (including newborn infants) for wrongdoings. This includes, but is not limited to: spanking, paddling, physical labor, torture (waterboarding, etc.), kicking, punching, burning, drowning, and strangulation. Use of karate/Tae-Kwon-Do is also permitted on disobedient children.

Caregivers are permitted to use the following on children for corporal punishment: Bare hands, fists, shoes (spikes, cleats, spurs), belts, wooden boards/paddles, newspapers, books, baseball bats, golf clubs, plastic tubing, metal rods, tree branches, hammers, pepper spray, or other house tools. 

Other forms of punishments are also permitted: Isolation, starvation, grounding, and abandonment. 

Caregivers are permitted to discipline/beat up children and babies for no specific reason if they please.  

March 24:  President Ted Cruz signs a bill forcing all citizens (regardless of religion) to attend a Christian church service of their choice on a weekly basis for at least 45 minutes. 

March 25-31:  All US citizens are ordered by President Ted Cruz to go to their local police stations to be fitted with “church ankle bracelets”. These ankle bracelets will ensure that all citizens obey the church requirements. 

Church Attendance Requirement in Detail:

All citizens, regardless of religious preference, are mandated to attend a Christian church service of their choice at least one (1) time per week. Citizens must attend this church service for a minimum duration of forty-five (45) minutes. Upon arrival at the church, volunteers at said-church will scan the ankle bracelets to record attendance. 

Consequences for refusal: Those who do not attend the church service for at least the forty-five (45) minute minimal requirement will be given a fine of $40. Those who are not able to pay the $40 fine within seven (7) days after receiving it in the mail will be given four (4) hours of community service per offense. Those who are unable to pay the $40 fine or perform the community service (due to disability) will be sentenced to 48 hours of house arrest. 

April 2: The Mandatory Church Law comes into full effect

June 2:  A bill is signed by President Ted Cruz prohibiting all sales and ownership of movies rated PG and up. 

June 3-9: Government officials, SWAT Team members, and local police are ordered by Cruz to raid people’s homes to remove movie contraband. 

Movie Law In Detail:

All films, videos, and movies given the PG-rating and up are prohibited by law. 

Exception: The PG-rated or up material’s theme has to do with the Christian faith in a positive manner (e.g. “The Passion of the Christ”, “God is Not Dead”, “Noah”)

Consequences for Found Prohibited Contraband: The penalty for possession of prohibited material is a fine of $25 and three (3) hours of community service. Those who are not able to pay the $50 fine within seven (7) days after receiving the fine in the mail will be given three (3) additional hours of community service per offense. Those who are unable to pay the $25 fine or perform the community service (due to disability) will be sentenced to 36 hours (1.5 days) of house arrest.

June 10: The Movie Law goes into full Effect

July 7:  A bill is signed by President Ted Cruz prohibiting all sales and possession of music unrelated to the Christian faith.

July 8-14: Government officials, SWAT Team members, and local police are ordered by Cruz to raid people’s homes to remove music contraband.

Music Law In Detail:

All forms of music not having to do with the Christian faith are prohibited by law. This includes, but not limited to: Rock and Roll, Jazz/Blues, Pop, Rap, Techno. Single-song exceptions will be made by the US Government to the types of music listed above if said-song contains lyrics relating to the Christian faith in a positive manner. 

Consequences for Found Prohibited Contraband: The penalty for possession of prohibited material is a fine of $25 and three (3) hours of community service. This who are not able to pay the $25 within seven (7) days after receiving the fine in the mail will be given three (3) additional hours of community service per offense. Those who are unable (due to disability) or refuse to perform the community service or the $25 fine will be sentenced to 36 hours (1.5 days) of house arrest.

July 15: The Music Law goes into full effect

2014

November 1: Comedian and magician Penn Jillette announces his running for the 2016 Presidential Election, running as a Libertarian. He states quote on quote “I will end Christian Sharia Law set forth by President Ted Cruz”.

2015

January 14:  Businessman/entrepreneur Donald Trump announces his running for the 2016 Presidential Election, running as a Democrat. He states similar views as Libertarian candidate Penn Jillette. 

January 15:  Political statisticians as well as mathematicians conclude discover that a total of tens of billions of dollars in fines have been paid as a result for missed church attendance, ownership of music or movie paraphernalia.

2016

Democratic Nominees:

  • Donald Trump
  • Mark Cuban
  • Julian Castro (Dropped Out)
  • Kanye West (Dropped Out)

Libertarian Nominees:

  • Penn Jillette
  • Gary Johnson
  • William Weld
  • Austin Petersen
  • John McAfee
  • Vermin Supreme

March 17: William Weld, Austin Petersen, John McAfee and Vermin Supreme drop out of the Libertarian Race

March 31: Mark Cuban drops out of the Libertarian Race, making Donald Trump the Democratic Nominee

July 4: Democratic Nominee Donald Trump announces that Mark Cuban will be his running mate

July 5:  Libertarian nominee Penn Jillette announces that Gary Johnson will be his running mate

July 6:  Green Party nominee Jill Stein announces that Ajamu Baraka will be her running mate.

Presidential Debates: 2016

Note: Because Penn Jillette polled over 15% in national polls (39% average), he will be debating as a third-party candidate

September 26, 2016:  The first Presidential Debate is held at Liberty University in Lynchburg, Virginia: Cruz vs. Trump vs. Jillette. All 10,000 undergraduate students are forced to attend the debate.

October 4, 2016:  The Vice-Presidential Debate is held at Bob Jones University in Greenville, South Carolina: Falwell Jr. vs. Cuban vs. Johnson. All students are required to attend, or face unknown disciplinary action.

October 9, 2016:  The second Presidential Debate is held at Pensacola Christian College in Pensacola, Florida: Cruz vs. Trump vs. Jillette. All students know that attendance at the debate will be tracked and absolutely mandatory. Failure to attend would result in a fine, demerits, paddling and assignment of a Residence Assistant.

October 19, 2016:  The third and final Presidential Debate is held at Brigham Young University in Provo, Utah: Cruz vs. Trump vs. Jillette. All students are reminded that attendance is mandatory.

Major Polling Shutdowns

On October 26, 2016, all the mainstream polls such as Gallup, Rasmussen, Nielsen were abolished and shut down by the Republican government. They have been replaced by Christian organizations and Christian Universities.

2016 Polls (11/4/16)

Company Cruz (Inc.) (R) Trump (D) Jillette (LIBT) Stein (G)
Bob Jones University 97% 3% X X
Brigham Young University 94% 5% 1% X
Focus on the Family 95% 5% X X
Kingdom Identity Ministries 99.5% 0.5% X X
Liberty University 98% 2% X X
Liberty University Students Unanimous X X X
No Greater Joy Ministries 99.5% 0.5% X X
Pensacola Christian College 99.5% 0.5% X X
Westboro Baptist Church Unanimous X X X

Child Abuse Scandal (11/5/16)

On November 5, 2016, 2 days before the election, a video surfaces of Department of State Michael Pearl beating a 3-year old toddler he was asked to babysit with a hot iron and a golf club. Due to the Corporal Punishment Laws set forth on January 22, 2013, this form of discipline is legal and justified. In an interview on Fox News, Michael Pearl (Secretary of State) tells Sean Hannity that the child is in the hospital and the reason for him "assaulting" the child was because he spilt his juice on the floor.

November 8, 2016: Election Night

--Scorecard on Fox News and ABC will include Libertarian Penn Jillette--

6:00 PM ET

Kentucky’s 8 Electoral votes go to Penn Jillette (LIBT)

Jillette 8
Cruz 0
Trump 0

7:00 PM ET

Florida’s 29 Electoral votes go to Penn JIllette (LIBT)

Georgia’s 16 Electoral votes go to Penn Jillette (LIBT)

Indiana’s 11 Electoral votes go to Penn JIllette (LIBT)

New Hampshire’s 4 Electoral votes go to Penn Jillette (LIBT)

South Carolina’s 9 Electoral votes go to Penn Jillette (LIBT)

Tennessee’s 11 Electoral votes go to Penn Jillette (LIBT)

Vermont’s 3 Electoral votes go to Penn Jillette (LIBT)

Virginia’s 13 Electoral votes go to Penn Jillette (LIBT)

West Virginia’s 5 Electoral votes go to Penn Jillette (LIBT)

Jillette 109
Cruz 0
Trump 0

7:30 PM ET

North Carolina’s 15 Electoral votes go to Penn Jillette (LIBT)

Ohio’s 18 Electoral votes go to Penn Jillette (LIBT)

Jillette 142
Cruz 0
Trump 0

8:00 PM ET

Alabama’s 9 Electoral votes go to Ted Cruz (R)

Connecticut’s 7 Electoral votes go to Penn Jillette (LIBT)

Delaware’s 3 Electoral votes go to Penn Jillette (LIBT)

District of Columbia’s 3 Electoral votes go to Donald Trump (D)

Illinois’s 20 Electoral votes go to Penn Jillette (LIBT)

Kansas’s 6 Electoral votes go to Penn Jillette (LIBT)

Maine’s 2 Statewide Electoral votes go to Penn JIllette (LIBT)

Maine’s 1st Congressional District goes to Penn Jillette (LIBT)

Maine’s 2nd Congressional District goes to Penn Jillette (LIBT)

Maryland’s 10 Electoral votes go to Penn Jillette (LIBT)

Massachusetts’s 11 Electoral votes go to Penn Jillette (LIBT)

Mississippi’s 6 Electoral votes go to Ted Cruz (R)

Missouri’s 10 Electoral votes go to Penn Jillette (LIBT)

New Jersey’s 14 Electoral votes go to Penn JIllette (LIBT)

Oklahoma’s 7 Electoral votes go to Penn Jillette (LIBT)

Pennsylvania’s 20 Electoral votes go to Penn Jillette (LIBT)

Rhode Island’s 4 Electoral votes go to Penn Jillette (LIBT)

South Dakota’s 3 Electoral votes go to Penn Jillette (LIBT)

Texas’s 38 Electoral votes too close to call

Jillette 261
Cruz 15
Trump 3

8:30 PM ET

Texas’s 38 Electoral votes go to Penn Jillette (LIBT)

Arkansas’s 6 Electoral votes go to Penn Jillette (LIBT)

--Penn Jillette is elected the 46th President of the United States--

Jillette 305
Cruz 15
Trump 3

9:00 PM ET

Arizona’s 11 Electoral votes go to Penn Jillette (LIBT)

Colorado’s 9 Electoral votes go to Penn Jillette (LIBT)

Louisiana’s 8 Electoral votes go to Penn Jillette (LIBT)

Michigan’s 16 Electoral votes go to Penn Jillette (LIBT)

Minnesota’s 10 Electoral votes go to Penn Jillette (LIBT)

Nebraska’s 2 Statewide Electoral votes go to Penn Jillette (LIBT)

Nebraska’s 1st Congressional District goes to Penn Jillette (LIBT)

Nebraska’s 2nd Congressional District goes to Penn Jillette (LIBT)

Nebraska’s 3rd Congressional District goes to Penn Jillette (LIBT)

Nevada’s 6 Electoral votes go to Penn Jillette (LIBT)

New Mexico’s 5 Electoral votes go to Penn Jillette (LIBT)

New York’s 29 Electoral votes go to Donald Trump (D)

Wisconsin’s 10 Electoral votes go to Penn Jillette (LIBT)

Wyoming’s 3 Electoral votes go to Penn Jillette (LIBT)

JIllette 388
Trump 32
Cruz 15

10:00 PM ET

Idaho’s 4 Electoral votes go to Penn Jillette (LIBT)

Iowa’s 6 Electoral votes go to Penn Jillette (LIBT)

Montana’s 3 Electoral votes go to Penn Jillette (LIBT)

North Dakota’s 3 Electoral votes go to Penn JIllette (LIBT)

Utah’s 6 Electoral votes too close to call

Jillette 404
Trump 32
Cruz 15

11:00 PM ET

Utah’s 6 Electoral votes go to Penn Jillette (LIBT)

California’s 55 Electoral votes go to Penn Jillette (LIBT)

Hawaii’s 4 Electoral votes go to Penn Jillette (LIBT)

Oregon’s 7 Electoral votes go to Penn Jillette (LIBT)

Washington’s 12 Electoral votes go to Penn Jillette (LIBT)

Jillette 488
Trump 32
Cruz 15

1:00 AM ET (November 9)

Alaska’s 3 Electoral votes go to Penn Jillette (LIBT)

Jillette 491
Trump 32
Cruz 15

Final Tally

Jillette 491
Trump 32
Cruz 15

Votes by State (Rounded to Nearest Thousand)

State EV's Cruz (R) Trump (D) Jillette (LIBT) Stein (G) Est. Total
Alabama 9 1,197,000 588,000 294,000 21,000 2,100,000
Alaska 3 78,000 63,000 108,000 3,000 252,000
Arizona 11 598,000 806,000 1,170,000 26,000 2,600,000
Arkansas 6 345,000 311,000 483,000 12,000 1,151,000
California 55 1,056,000 3,564,000 8,316,000 264,000 13,200,000
Colorado 9 364,000 884,000 1,326,000 26,000 2,600,000
Connecticut 7 32,000 725,000 811,000 8,000 1,576,000
Delaware 3 13,000 174,000 234,000 4,000 425,000
D.C. 3 2,000 194,000 102,000 3,000 301,000
Florida 29 2,040,000 2,210,000 4,165,000 85,000 8,500,000
Georgia 16 1,383,000 830,000 1,699,000 40,000 3,952,000
Hawaii 4 11,000 172,000 251,000 7,000 441,000
Idaho 4 132,000 203,000 338,000 3,000 676,000
Illinois 20 239,000 2,067,000 2,915,000 80,000 5,301,000
Indiana 11 557,000 689,000 1,378,000 27,000 2,651,000
Iowa 6 128,000 672,000 784,000 16,000 1,600,000
Kansas 6 175,000 338,000 725,000 13,000 1,251,000
Kentucky 8 630,000 414,000 738,000 18,000 1,800,000
Maine CD-1 1 10,000 121,000 254,000 6,000 391,000
Maine CD-2 1 15,000 92,000 231,000 2,000 340,000
Maine 2 25,000 213,000 485,000 8,000 731,000
Maryland 10 218,000 927,000 1,553,000 27,000 2,725,000
Massachusetts 11 64,000 768,000 2,304,000 64,000 3,200,000
Michigan 16 480,000 1,776,000 2,496,000 48,000 4,800,000
Minnesota 10 104,000 1,250,000 1,577,000 45,000 2,976,000
Mississippi 6 702,000 338,000 247,000 13,000 1,300,000
Missouri 10 616,000 728,000 1,428,000 28,000 2,800,000
Montana 3 170,000 120,000 205,000 5,000 500,000
Nebraska CD-1 1 89,000 49,000 130,000 3,000 271,000
Nebraska CD-2 1 38,000 76,000 154,000 3,000 271,000
Nebraska CD-3 1 65,000 55,000 138,000 3,000 261,000
Nebraska 2 192,000 180,000 422,000 9,000 803,000
Nevada 6 67,000 369,000 574,000 15,000 1,025,000
New Hampshire 4 36,000 252,000 425,000 7,000 720,000
New Jersey 14 185,000 1,480,000 1,998,000 37,000 3,700,000
New Mexico 5 56,000 208,000 528,000 8,000 800,000
New York 29 326,000 3,843,000 2,900,000 181,000 7,250,000
North Carolina 15 1,183,000 1,274,000 2,048,000 46,000 4,551,000
North Dakota 3 96,000 89,000 142,000 3,000 330,000
Ohio 18 616,000 2,184,000 2,744,000 56,000 5,600,000
Oklahoma 7 454,000 280,000 587,000 13,000 1,334,000
Oregon 7 72,000 738,000 972,000 18,000 1,800,000
Pennsylvania 20 754,000 1,682,000 3,306,000 58,000 5,800,000
Rhode Island 4 17,000 166,000 285,000 7,000 475,000
South Carolina 9 700,000 340,000 940,000 20,000 2,000,000
South Dakota 3 113,000 83,000 176,000 4,000 376,000
Tennessee 11 975,000 350,000 1,150,000 25,000 2,500,000
Texas 38 2,805,000 2,635,000 2,975,000 85,000 8,500,000
Utah 6 410,000 164,000 441,000 10,000 1,025,000
Vermont 3 2,000 87,000 201,000 11,000 300,000
Virginia 13 585,000 1,365,000 1,911,000 39,000 3,900,000
Washington 12 173,000 1,071,000 1,859,000 47,000 3,150,000
West Virginia 5 236,000 149,000 284,000 7,000 676,000
Wisconsin 10 279,000 1,271,000 1,519,000 31,000 3,100,000
Wyoming 3 93,000 35,000 120,000 3,000 251,000
Total 538 21,168,000 41,319,000 64,639,000 1,634,000 128,760,000

General Public Reactions

  • In Chicago, Illinois, many Penn Jillette supporters held up "W" signs like when the Chicago Cubs win a game. 
  • In Miami, Florida, a bonfire of Ted Cruz was lit while people threw glass bottles at it. 
  • In Boston, Massachussets, Penn Jillette and Raymond Teller performed a free, city-wide magic show the day after the election.

Conservative Reactions

  • Westboro Baptist Church, who were endorsers of Ted Cruz, held a picketing in Downtown Topeka, Kansas
  • Secretary of Treasury Micah Armstrong went on campus to Harvard University and told all Penn Jillette, Donald Trump, and Jill Stein voters they were all "going to Hell" for not voting Ted Cruz. 

Post-Election/Pre-Inauguration

December 17, 2016: President-Elect Penn Jillette calls for the arrest of President Ted Cruz and Vice-President Jerry Falwell Jr.

December 18, 2016: President-Elect Penn Jillette calls for the arrest of Secretary of State Michael Pearl for charges of Child Endangerment as well as Child Abuse. Jillette also calls for a mandatory closing of Bob Jones University and Pensacola Christian College for using barbaric disciplinary measures among the students.

2017

TBD

See Also

http://future.wikia.com/wiki/Scenario:_Christian_States_of_America

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